Thank You Charles Darwin

by matthew scott harris
(schwenksville, pennsylvania)

i dont bark only byte.

as origin of Homo Sapien species surged ahead,
harboring nascent predominance
asper said primate reproductively bred
(albeit via incremental fits and starts)
evolutionary forebears didst dread

lock, stock and barrel arboreal cred
whence, (since time immemorial) nasty, short
brutish, loutish, and vampish anthropological,
genealogical, and millennial report
card found forebears

precariously position quart
toured place de resistance purport
head supremacy devastatingly,
heavily, and literally bruited nearly abort
ting tentative tenacious status oft times

challenged minuscule leading edge
proto humans rendered perch
(on evolutionary leading cusp) fund hedge
ching hypothetical bets said simians

nearly toppled off figurative privy ledge
against being easily uprooted
akin to one weeding out unwanted sedge
imposing fledgling breakfast of champions
clinging to niched wedge

while serial incessant challenges nearly wrote
off and snuffed out, extinct et cetera
clinched placed viz ass him tote
often at fateful loggerheads,
where survival of the fittest smote
poised dawn of dusky mankind

viz apish creatures almost got rote
off while chance dominance, eminence grise
pitted, spitted, and got vetted sans un quote
able primal screaming expletives
pitted Neanderthal progenitors note

worthy kickstarter scrum
ump hired held dim promise,
whether weathered brood,
which smattering population comprised
a scattered handful of rudimentary

destined to become
some ascribe God's sigh propitiated
contemporary lass hit dude
whence, amidst looming pointed danger
confronted Geico caveman,

and aside from external
threatening depredations
comprised tribal family feud
where might versus right
the deterministic factor aye include

at undoubtedly animalistic behavior
defied being categorized as lewd
since each monkey's uncle
punctuated equilibrium with cut throat

i.e. Maciavellian imprimatur
fate didst not occlude
attested via rotogravure fledgling artistic shewed
also absence of consciousness rued

until...fast four words
(count them) - to the present system of a down day
when carnal, feral, and integral leanings attempted
to rope hormonal, gonadal, and banal found
more recent ancestors (discovered
visa vis like 23andme)

on a greenday rolled in the hay
under natural predilection to lay
naked, especially frisky comb early May
procreative force
engendered the writer of this poem,
when his parents coaxed fore play

unbeknownst, that their singular heir,
would be afflicted with countless
mental ollie ollie oxen stinging ray
obsessive compulsive mailer to slay
ritualistic controlling psychic threnody
dominated favored holistic paradigm oye vay.